the resolution.

"there's a lot that i don't know, there's a lot that i'm still learning...i need light in the dark as i search for the resolution."

2010.  i described it, as the chinese do, as the year of the <insert something here>.  my 2010 was "the year of the airplane".  silver status on two airlines, platinum status on my hotel brand of choice, and got to see some of the country i hadn't been to before, philadelphia being my favorite.  it was a wild ride, but i'm looking forward to extending the year of the airplane into 2011.

the best of the year?  travel.  feeling like i finally was on the right track as to what i wanted to be when i grow up.  appreciation at work.  a stronger marriage in some ways, though weaker in others (that part isn't the best).  i became more aware of the time i had at home and how to appreciate what little time i had with family, friends, and especially my little familial unit in charleston. the milestone of owning a house for a year, and seeing all the work we've done on it come together.  racking up enough loyalty points to travel for leisure and not have to pay for anything.

the worst?  over 50,000 miles in the air.  almost 200 nights spent in hotels and not my own house.  not being able to play the guitar.  realizing what i want and what i can't have are the same.

despite the lack of time in charleston, i really think this year was exactly what i needed.  i was feeling trapped in this city and my job was able to make the best of both worlds.  i would go somewhere else until i was sick of it, and then i got to go home!  perfection.  i got to work with a lot of like-minded people and made friends out of several coworkers; i am more than thankful for my "work family", without them i would've been a miserable, unsuccessful creature, and i look forward to many more adventures.

looking forward, its that time of year that we make resolutions.  i have only two:  listen to a bunch of new music.  and act my age.  i am still a kid by the numbers, but i've been a part of the adult world for five years now.  i resolve to have a lot more fun, take more risks, and try new things.

keep reading in 2011 to see how i do.  happy new year.

reflections on a percentage.

i am twenty-four years old.  yesterday marked the point where i realized i had spent twenty-five percent of my life with my husband.  wow.  it really made me take a step back and think of what that meant.

i met thomas after playing a gig in beckley.  special guest had played that night with a few other bands and it was a homecoming of sorts for me, having not played since i went away to college.  he was there supporting his brother, who had played bass for one of the bands that night, and it was the first time i had met him, even though i had agreed to spend the rest of that week before christmas helping him on a film, lifting and toting and the like.  i had no idea what i was getting out of the deal.  i thought it would just be some work experience in my field.  look what i ended up with.

fast forward to now.  we've been married three years, together for six.  as i posted on love several weeks ago, my ideas on what marriage is and isn't have changed significantly, though i believe it's for the best.  i got myself locked into a partnership, not a romance.  it's a series of challenges, a teammate to help me get through this thing called life.  i love where we've made it so far.

there are a lot of people i know that knew me for many years before they knew my husband.  it warms my heart to know there are also a lot of people that have never known us apart.  to many of our friends, we have always been a unit, our names generally used together, not ever knowing one without the other.  and while we are both very independent people and i sometimes cringe at the idea of being even slightly dependent on someone else (i am thankful for someone who can reach the cabinet above the fridge and unscrew stubborn jars), i like knowing that without that twenty-five percent of my life with him in it i would be a very different person, probably not nearly as happy and successful as i am now.

deck the halls.

i figured if i didn't get the tree up today it was never going to happen, so i spent the afternoon decorating for the holiday.  last year when we got the house, we didn't really get to do much decorating, still getting settled in and all it was hard to find time to hang up a bunch of stuff when we still had boxes to unpack.  of course ziggy wanted to help me.

i hung up lights outside for the first time this year.  it was a cold and arduous task and i'm not sure i want to do it again next year, but it looks festive enough.  i don't know of anyone else on the street that's decorated yet; hoping we'll be trendsetters.

the stockings are hung by the chimney with care.  two years of sayre family santa photos along the mantle and an army of nutcrackers.  thomas loves nutcrackers.



we didn't get a real tree this year, and while i'm sad that my house won't smell amazing, i'm not so sad about cleaning up pine needles for the next 11 months.  i still find them in places from last year.  unbelievable.  i absolutely love our tree though.  when we were still living in apartments, i said we couldn't get a real tree.  neither one of us were interested in hauling a tree up three flights of stairs.  so we got the most god-awfully tacky tinsel tree i could find.  i said if we were having a fake tree, there was going to be no doubt that it was fake.  it's so fantastically hideous and i love it.  silver tinsel complete with retro bubble lights and more c6 lights than should be allowed on a single tree.  it looks like it might set the curtains on fire, but whatever.  its probably my favorite part of christmas.

 i'm not the biggest fan of christmas, so i'm waiting a few days to put the ornaments on.  feel like i better make the festive feelings last.  fa la la la la.....

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its beginning to look a lot like december.

well, it finally feels like winter here in charleston.  i woke up this morning to snow on my car and a feeling of sadness, hoping the rental car gods had blessed me with an ice scraper.  i don't like cold weather. i hate all of that jazz that comes along with the "beauty" of winter; if you're into dead trees with frozen water stuck to their branches, black ice, soul-crushing temperatures and seasonal depression, more power to you.  i'm into sunshine, lightweight hoodies and shorts, thanks.

but regardless, while i was sitting in my office i did have to marvel at the flurries outside my big window.  i work at an airport, on top of a mountain where there's nothing to block the chilling winds that will literally take your breath away.  this wind made the snowflakes flutter around aimlessly and for a little while it really did look like a snowglobe.  i went for a run tonight and while it was absolutely freezing, it was kind of pretty.  i liked seeing the little white bits floating in the glow of the streetlights, clashing with the dark that comes way too early these days, the christmas lights that people have already put up (it's december now, so i guess thats acceptable), the massive lit christmas tree on top of the bb&t building.

maybe the "beauty" of winter is beautiful in the way that some dogs are so ugly they're cute, but after tonight, i'd rather enjoy it from inside my warm house. hello winter.  i'm not happy you're here, but you can stay for a few months, i guess.